Being Frail Is Scary
Hello warriors, how are you?
Last week was awful, during Physio we were trying to find my ‘baseline’ and it massively increased my pain and wiped me out. 7 days later my pain was much more manageable so we tried again.
We only did 20% of our Week 1 exercises. So, the main exercise was this:
From the image above, I then held it for a couple of seconds. I did 4 reps of this. NO SQUEEZING!!! ZERO SQUEEZING of the imaginary golf ball between my shoulder blades! I was still chatty at the end of the session and ready to edit. BUT. 30 minutes later, I crashed (had to sleep).
I was in bed and unable to get back up that day. FCUK.
By the time you read this I will have done the 3rd session. Its moving my upper body that is killing me….ok that was an exaggeration….obviously.
This was a 2 second hold in the above position, I am still in extra pain and that was hours ago. I don’t want to be in extra pain.
My upper body, my core, my back muscles are so weak I am not able to support my own body to keep it upright. I use my energy first thing to go for a walk, this is 3 quarters of my daily steps. I LOVE it, I feel such a sense of achievement every time I do this, no matter how long I have to stay on the ground for:
You know I did the video, I failed:
Well, yes, I did fail. But that does not mean I am giving up. I failed the majority of sections of PIP, BUT I succeeded in ONE area.
So, really I WON. It took me YEARS of training, years of every single day trying to carefully build my strength up again.
So, now. It’s the start of my 2 year plan on upper body. My Physio and I are going to film a lot of this, but we didn’t film the first two meetings as we were finding our feet together. This time I want to show the progress and PROVE it is possible to succeed.
I am:
Disabled NOT Dead.
Achievement of the week
You are NOT going to believe this! Its my second week of the: week on (consultancy) and week off (YouTube/development). This was my week off, I got a massive video filmed and started editing!
I sorted my company bank account.
I did Physio twice.
I did training with Ollie:
And most importantly I did 2 things I have wanted to do for over 9 months. You know when you can see something every day but you don’t have the energy to do it? Well, I put aside a WHOLE DAY, with not a single meeting and I did it:
1. Update my mobiles with new/items that fell off!
2. Sort out the succulents
Da daaaaaa
Because I am soooo fit!!!! I could do it!!!!!
What has made me happy
My YouTube mentor and I had a meeting and he made me laugh so hard it was almost as bad as finding the baseline in Physio LOL.
He did this to my channel:
And was reading out stats of my most popular videos, the reason was that I am not sure if I should cut the big videos into smaller chunks for people or is it causing issues and not worth it?
The outcome was, if it adds value, keep doing it.
What made me so happy was how freely he spoke to me and how mindblowing his mentorship is.
Now when you read this, image a extremely frustrated, confused, how the hell can you NOT know this already……..tone of voice:
Jamie: I’m using the most popular tab on your videos, how do you not check this ALL the time?!!!!!
Me (laughing hard and trying to grab Tramadol and my ribs at the same time): Well I didn’t know that was what I was supposed to!
I go to most popular videos when I look at someones channel, but for my own I was going in analytics. It was so simple and obvious it was embarrassing. I had 4 things on my list that resulted in this type of response hahahahaha
It was such a great meeting and so funny! It made me so happy and gave me a nice clear direction.
Books I have read
Richard!!!!!! Everyone!!!!!!!!!! Guess what???!!!!
I know its been a while…..but I read this:
I think she is inspirational, I love her honesty and that she is a ‘work in progress’ like all of us.
Arthritis update
As my body has been shutting down (sleeping in the middle of the day for 3-8hrs); I took the dogs out late (due to the heat as well) 3 times. It was amazing being out in the evening. I never get to do this as I decline so hard.
It was only possible due to the shutdowns. But it was a mistake.
In the past week I have been stuck in bed 3 times. 3 mornings, I have woken up and been physically stuck in bed, due to pain and fatigue. 2 occasions I was so stuck I could not reach my pain meds and there was no way I was going to be able to get my am meds.
It took me 3-5hrs each time to build up to getting out of bed. There is NO WAY I want to go back to that life. I just need to accept my limits……..and work on my fitness to SLOWLY build up to increasing my ‘alert/active’ time.
I am NOT giving up. I am NOT letting chronic illness win. I am adapting to what works for my body. But I have to listen to it or my quality of life will be shit.
I never want my life to be like that again. Onwards we go!!!
PIP
OK, I just filmed and edited (well, I barely edited the video) and to be honest…..if you are reading this for the PIP bits. Please please watch the video at the end of this.
Warning:
I get very passionate
I do swear (a lot) near the end
I am right (that doesn’t often happen in most areas of life LOL, but in this case = I am right)
What I am looking forward to
Soooo much!
My physio is looking at all aspects of my life, I am looking forward to dropping weight
I topped up my bird feeders (today!) I am looking forward to the families of birds visiting
I am excited to finish editing a big video I have filmed that will really help people
I need to finish another video that will be my BEST PIP guide to date
I have the energy to DUST my TV – so excited to do this
I have started a second book…..can’t wait to read it
I have another meeting booked with Jamie (my YouTube mentor), it will be amazing
I booked a meeting on the 19th of August with FAWKES – I am so excited about it
I want to have the energy to wash my face, with those er….you know you have a bottle of it and use cotton pads…..that stuff. It feels so good afterwards.
This weeks video
Take care of yourself
Charlie
P.S If any of you want to contact me, please email: charliesjourney2024@outlook.com
Code name: YOLO protects me, so she manages all email communication and attempts to make sure I do not over load myself LOL
To book an appointment with me: https://calendly.com/charliesjourney
If you want to send me a little thank you (please do NOT do this unless you can truly afford it as I promise I have food to eat and can pay the mortgage x), here is my Amazon wish list: https://www.amazon.co.uk/hz/wishlist/ls/29P1EFQ3E47FW?ref_=wl_share